Kai Peter Chang
I have some good news: Male attractiveness is far more contextual and malleable than female attractiveness, so let’s focus on three fixes, in order of how quickly you realize returns on time investment.
1. Let’s start with something that is the most easily-fixed:
Are you reading this on a computer or cell phone? Of course you are. Freeze – don’t move just because you’re reading this, but what is your posture right now?
Being regularly slumped/hunched-over visits a cluster of cascading bad consequences to your life, including negative impact on your long-term spinal health. For now, let’s focus on appearances:Want to look better in seconds? Straighten up your body.
For those of you more visually-oriented, imagine you’re a puppet with a string attached to the top of your head. The puppeteer who is controlling “you” pulls gently until your heels are barely grazing the floor – that’s the correct position for both health as well as maximizing your own height and personal presence. And since most people (including handsomer men than you) have bad posture, you can easily set yourself apart and place yourself in the top 10 percent of men in most rooms, just by the act of maintaining a good posture.
2. Weight Lifting
The human body is a remarkable machine – the harder you work it, the more beautiful it becomes. You don’t need to commit to a hardcore bodybuilder schedule to reap the benefits – two to three times a week of weights that push you to muscle failure after 5~10 repetitions will be sufficient.
Newbie men tend to fixate on upper body, but the real benefits come when you incorporate deadlifts, squats and lower-body training to your regimen – a strong core and well-developed glutes/legs will help you default to a healthy posture (as mentioned in 1. above) and you will “catch” yourself less frequently in a bad slouching posture if you are regularly lifting and pushing your muscles and training them to failure on a regular basis.
Once you develop a decent level of musculature, you will realize an awesome passive benefit: muscle consume more calories, and so a more-muscular “you” has a baseline metabolism at a much higher level, so even while you’re resting, you’re going to burn more fat than a sedentary version of you.
3. Cultivate/Amplify/Develop Gender-Atypical Interests & Hobbies
As a guy, have you had the experience of being in a stereotypically-male environment and see a woman show up alone, and with her own gear to participate?
Don’t give up your hobbies, but take some time to feel out activities that you can genuinely enjoy, that most men don’t take the initiative to explore.
Salsa dancing. Poetry slams. Book-reading clubs. Cooking classes. Wine-tasting tours.
Me, I have a little dog and the small-dog meetups are basically filled with dog-loving young women and gay men. Nearly zero competition.
As the lone male in an otherwise female-dominated arena, your contextual attractiveness skyrockets, and if you can talk intelligently about the subject matter , you set yourself far, far apart from your male competitors.
James L Moyer
1) Clothes that fit. A few of us are gifted with dimensions that allow us to purchase straight off the rack. But most men (myself included) absolutely need to have custom-fitted clothing. Do this. Cut the number of clothes you buy in half. And double what you spend on each item. You will look great and feel great when your clothes fit perfectly.
2) As another poster said, assume everyone likes you. Take the lead when meeting people. Pretend you are a host or that you have the responsibility to help others enjoy themselves in a conversation. Most people are awkward or nervous in social situations, so if you take the pressure off of them, they’ll love you for it and see you as more attractive.
3) Find a friend who always looks sharp. Ask them for tips for you.
4) Believe you are handsome. Confidence is attractive.