1. my requirements for sleeping at night: is the pillow cool enough? are my legs positioned so they don’t put too much weight on each other? are my arms tucked in nicely and not at odd angles? can I stop thinking about the day’s events? is enough of my body out from under the blanket that I won’t overheat? are my toes safely tucked in to hide them from monsters?

my requirements for sleeping in the morning: is the surface vaguely horizontal and not made entirely out of hornets evilroachindustrial

me, the entire day: oh my god i’m so tired, i can’t wait to go to back to sleep
me, at 3 AM: cinnabonngene

3. did you know: there are people who can lie down, at a reasonable hour, and just sleep? fall asleep, easily? regularly? on a regular basis? roughly every night? wild greedily.co.vu

*6am, opens eyes*
me: I can’t wait to go to bed tonight. saveme-amazeme

5. sure, I don’t get a “healthy” amount of sleep like SOME PEOPLE do but can they do THIS *stands up, blacks out for a second* maybenotboring

6. I don’t get how ppl take quick power naps. When I nap I literally never wake up volcainist

me:wakes up
me:continues 2 chill for another 3 hrs in bed for good measure flowury

wakes up: tired
mid day: tired
afternoon: could literally sleep for 20 hours straight
evening: normal
middle of the goddamn night: its time to Go!!!!!!!!! fiyhi

me in the evening: oh, staying up late isn’t bad, I’ll manage tomorrow
me in the morning: AM I A FUCKING IDIOT? sci-universe.com

10. Schrodinger’s Nap: where you are both too tired to do things and awake enough to not fall asleep so you just lie in bed with your eyes closed suffering. zabreneva

me: I’m gonna go to sleep now
me to myself: ʷʰʸ ᵗʰᵉ fᵘͨᵏ ʸºᵘ ˡʸʸʸ’ⁿ, ʷʰʸ ʸºᵘ ᵃˡʷᵃʸˢ ˡʸʸʸ’ⁿ, ᵐᵐᵐᵐᵐᵐ ºʰ ᵐʸ ᵍºᵈ ˢᵗºp fᵘͨᵏ’ⁿ ˡʸʸʸ’ⁿ dogsenthusiast

Me: i want to sleep for like 30 hours
Friend: you know that’s a coma right
Me: god that sounds so refreshing i could totally go for a light coma right now songrequests

13. *goes to sleep around 1:30am instead of 3:30am* i am the epitome of health and wellness look at me managing my sleep schedule and going to bed EARLY like a functional member of society! internetcultleader

14. “beauty sleep” is such bullshit I sleep 12 hours a day and I still look like a trashcan blank

Me: today I’m gonna GET MY SHIT TOGETHER
Me: sleeps all day
Me: …
Me: Tomorrow. Tomorrow I’m gonna GET MY SHIT TOGETHER nowletsfixthismess

16. do you ever go to sleep really early because youre bored and want the day to end sexanax

17. Due to unfortunate circumstances, I am awake. baku

18. people are always like “are you a morning person or a night person” and I’m just like buddy I’m barely even a person princessdanhowell