Password must contain a capital letter, a number, a plot, a protagonist with some character development, and a surprise ending.— John Green (@johndashgreen) April 2, 2013
Amazon thinks my recent humidifier purchase was merely the inaugural move in a newfound hobby of humidifier collecting.— Justin Shanes (@justinshanes) November 29, 2016
i love that kanye gets into very specific beefs with ppl i have to google but he's nice enough to say both their first & last name— Desus Nice (@desusnice) February 24, 2016
"murder" she wrote— Joe West (@joejwest) January 5, 2015
"your password must contain at least one number and one upper case letter" the screen said
"murd3R" she wrote, frowning
*Opens Snapchat*— Corey not Cor (@CoreysThirst) June 15, 2016
"so today I was…."
"I just hate when.."
"Lemme tell y'all what just happe…."
"My boyfriend.." pic.twitter.com/ADZ392KV4y
I had to delete Facebook because I liked too many pictures of dogs yesterday and now the newsfeed algorithm thinks I care about those people— folu (@notfolu) August 27, 2015
Sorry but your password must contain an uppercase letter, a number, a haiku, a gang sign, a hieroglyph, and the blood of a virgin— Fill Werrell (@FillWerrell) January 23, 2013
Google isn't much help if you can't think of the word 'zebra' pic.twitter.com/mLa7mkWzCc— ♡ brian essbe ♡ (@SortaBad) April 25, 2015
When someone likes their own Instagram photo pic.twitter.com/e3CLzliVTN— Medieval Reactions (@MedievalReacts) October 15, 2015
Leaving my browser history open in case anyone in this coffee shop tries to steal my laptop when I'm in the bathroom. pic.twitter.com/IOo89Vypy7— Chelsea Lockwood (@Chelsea_Elle) March 16, 2014
The new options on Facebook look like the life cycle of every relationship I've ever had pic.twitter.com/LOwqS3vF8w— Melanie Bracewell (@meladoodle) February 24, 2016
AMAZON: Did you buy a watch?!— Brian Doyle (@WritePlay) November 25, 2016
ME: Yeah, it's-
AMAZON: You might want THIS watch!
ME: No I already-
AMAZON: ONLY WATCHES FOR YOU, FOREVERMORE
me: How long are you going to keep throwing that in my face?!— Josh (@iwearaonesie) November 11, 2016
Netflix: Because you watched "The Wedding Planner"
When your internet goes out and you are forced to get to know your surroundings pic.twitter.com/nHYrLkV9IR— Awkward Comedy (@AwkwardComedy) June 26, 2016
People are writing condolences on my Grandma's Facebook that sound more like Yelp reviews of her. Great woman, very loving, 5/5 stars— Bitch Mittens (@Jesssicle) June 6, 2016
If Facebook Was Real— spacegirl incognito (@iamspacegirl) August 29, 2016
me: cool shirt Brian
[hours later, a knock at my door]
me: um yes?
Brian's Mom: I also like that shirt
[please enter a password]— josh (@ruinedpicnic) February 11, 2015
[password must contain at least one capital]
*turns on internet*— jomny sun, authoer (@jonnysun) October 25, 2016
computor, i need to take a break from trying to achieve one thing. show me all of the achievments of others all at once
"I wish I had more time to read" he said as Netflix automatically played the next episode.— Sammy Rhodes (@sammyrhodes) January 3, 2015
*forgets Netflix password*— Noah Kinsey (@thenoahkinsey) July 25, 2016
*sends email reset*
*forgets email password*
*sends reset to backup*
20 resets later:
*opens 2nd Netflix account*