On last night’s Tonight Show, Jimmy Fallon read out some of the funniest tweets form his latest hashtag, #MyWorstDate. Here are some of the best ones we found:
At the end of the date, I asked if she wanted to go out again. She said she was going to take a break from dating for a while.
On my worst date he showed me pictures of his house plants and explained their different watering schedules.
On my date during an awkward silence, the boy drummed on the table while mumbling topic, topic, topic
Sophmore homecoming. DJ announces that this was the last song and my date said “Finally!”
My worst date told me he had trouble finding something to wear the cat hadn’t peed on.
She told me she just got out of a relationship with a guy that sounded a lot like my friend Mark. I texted Mark, it was Mark.
the guy parked in a handicapped spot, pulled out a pass and said, “thanks Grandma”
Thought it’d be cool to slide across the hood of her car, and tore my pants on the hood ornament. Lost the girl AND my pride.
My date saw I was wearing a Superman ring so he drew a flowchart on a napkin & ranted for 40mins about why Batman was better
My friend had a date who proposed to her just to get a free desert. She’s single now.
He printed out my online profile, and handed it to me when I asked what kind of people he liked.
I had a guy pick me up in his own pedicab. It was raining.
My mom wouldn’t let me use her car so I took my dad’s after I changed the tire. The wheel fell off while I was driving.
At the movies, he got buttery popcorn, & handed me tongs so my hands wouldn’t be greasy to touch his car with.
Took a guy home & he asked me for nail clippers bc he “didn’t want to scratch me in my sleep” then he cut his nails ON MY BED
We were late for the movie. All flustered, I misread the marquee & took us into Prince of Darkness instead of Princess Bride.
My date kept mentioning a woman. Finally I asked, “I’m sorry do you have a girlfriend?” His response, “Hmm…More or less.”
I went on a date, he took me to Wendy’s and said, “Only order from the dollar menu.”
My date said I was his 12 year old sister so the movie was cheaper. I was 17 at the time!
My worst date: a blind date told me over drinks that we could go to his house later and meet his wife.
Halfway through the meal he pulled out a small screwdriver and started cleaning his ears with it.
A girl tried to kiss me with a mouthful of ranch dressing
My crush and I went to McDonalds. I started laughing @ something he said, choked on my fry & threw up all over him.