*about to check bank account*
Me: “I’m guessing I should probably have about $200 left”
*bank account*: $3.64
Thought I had $707 in my bank account, turns out it was “LOL” and I was holding my statement upside down.
Just called the bank for my account info and a voice whispered ‘If you break the pack in half, Ramen noodles can last you two days.’
me finding out who’s been spending all my money
Someone should make a food app that connects to your bank account and only lists restaurants you can afford, could call it Welp
I totally get your eyebrows.
My bank account is overdrawn, too.
“I had $600 in my account and I spent $20. I should have $580 left.”
Me – I’m not in the mood to work today
My bank account – you better GET in the mood
I don’t mean to brag, but I’m in my 30′s and my bank account makes me look 21.
I hate ramen noodles.
*Checks bank account balance*
I love ramen noodles!
I keep checking my bank account like a hungry person checking an empty refrigerator. Neither one is going to magically be full.
MUGGER: GIVE ME YOUR PURSE OR I’LL SHOOT YOU
ME: *realize I won’t have to pay student loans back if I’m dead*
ME: I’m thinking.
Between bank balances, my weight and age, math makes me more emotional than I ever thought possible.
HIM: What are you doing?
ME: Hiding some more money in the couch. Can’t trust the banks you know.
HIM: How much is in there?
“Your account ending in 4535 has an account balance of – ”
Me: Treat yo self
My Bank Account: DO NOT TREAT YO SELF
I keep forgetting my passwords so I changed them all to one that’s super easy for me to remember:
"Would you sleep in a haunted house for £600million?"— ㅤㅤHarrison Banks (@HvrrisonLdn) August 16, 2017