My first kiss was when I was 2. A boy in my daycare group kissed me and was promptly bitten by me in his cheek. The cheek bled and my parents were called. Dad was really proud of me.
P.S. It was the same boy coincidentally who rubbed the snow in my face years later and caught by my dad. Go figure.
Jess H. Brewer
I once took a lovely young woman out to dinner at a fancy restaurant and later for a walk on a romantic beach, where we turned to each other for our first kiss just as her body realized that she was allergic to the scallops she had for dinner. She had a brief convulsion and then threw up. I started to say, “Gosh, I’ve never had that reaction before,” but stopped myself because it wasn’t funny for her. We later had a brief but very pleasant relationship.
Hands down—the time I kissed my best friend
We met when we were 17. He is funny, smart, and he matches my sarcasm word for word. Our personalities couldn’t be more compatible.
We went on long walks. We talked for hours. We planned our futures. We were by most accounts inseparable.
Neither of us had ever experienced a real friendship with the opposite sex so I think that’s why he felt pressured to kiss me. One night, after a normal day of lounging around on my futon—he went all in.
He clumsily grabbed my face with his clammy hands as our tongues invaded each other’s mouths. Because of how we were situated, I didn’t know what to do with my hands so one was resting against his armpit and the other was unnaturally bent under my chin. Our breathing was all out of sync so it felt like we were just panting on each other. Plus, my eyes were wide open, practically bulging out of my head because I didn’t expect this At.All. Then, when I thought things couldn’t get any more awkward—cue the teeth clanking.
It felt sloppy. Unnatural. Weird.
What probably lasted 10-seconds felt like a lifetime.
When it was over, he got up, walked out of my room, and went home. It never happened again.
A decade later, we are still best friends. And, we are both happily married—to men.
Talking to new friend. Somehow topic of sex and relationships comes up. She identifies as a gay woman but also relates that she doesn’t actually know whether or not she’s into guys. We also talk about how people act around people that they’re attracted to, and she calls out straight guys for never having the courage to just ask to kiss someone.
Me: (…meh, what the hell.) Can I kiss you?
Her: gives a goofy smile Where did that come from?
Me: I dunno.
Her: I mean… I’m going to have to think about it.
Five minutes pass.
Me: kisses her
Two seconds pass.
Her: pulls out Yeah, I’m gay.
Her: Sorry, I hope you’re not hurt by that moment.
Me: You don’t have to apologize for being honest. (Also, I did get to kiss you, so…)