i wonder what’s happening right now over at hogwarts fudgeflies
probably education since harry doesn’t go there anymore ispeakineloquently
dumbledore: our enchanted ceiling shows us wat the sky outside looks like
mcgonagall: so…a magic glass ceiling
dumbledore: [starts sweating]
the department of child services failed Harry Potter
Don’t worry if you peaked in high school. So did Harry Potter
If Dumbledore did a ‘Cribs’ episode for Hogwarts, he’d be like “and this is where the magic happens” in every room.
i want my money back from harry potter himself. i thought they banged in this one.
The Hogwarts teachers must have felt so stupid when their traps designed to keep Voldemort from the stone were beaten by three 11 year olds
Harry: albus severus, named after the 2 bravest men I ever knew
Ron: I literally sacrificed myself to a giant chess game when I was 11 for u
You gonna tell me NONE of Harry Potter’s classmates got pregnant at Hogwarts? No. Wrong. At least 7 of them were pregnant.
All the other schools in Harry Potter are called like, Hoobastank, or, Miss Marple ‘s Magical School For Worldly Girls
Harry Potter learned like, three spells in seven years.
a four-word summary of the harry potter series: “you were right, hermione.”
reasons the harry potter universe is fucked up #82932: there is the ghost of a murdered child in the bathroom and everyone treats it like a minor inconvenience
i still find it funny that the deadliest spell in the harry potter world, to which there is no surviving, is just misspelled ‘abra kadabra’
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (2001, Fantasy): A suburban British family is relieved that the weird cousin finally left.
Things Draco Malfoy says
You have your mother’s eyes
Harry Potter named all his kids like some nerd who had just finished reading Harry Potter.
Looking at the smoldering corpses of his enemies, Harry Potter thought “damn magic is dope as hell.”
My favorite Harry Potter character was the Sorting Hat. His job was to learn people’s secrets and then judge them.