I just walked into a trader joe’s for the first time out of curiosity and the first things I ran into were pickle flavored popcorn and a woman walking the aisles vigorously in a weighted vest.
I become quickly overstimulated and had to leave.
If I ever did drugs I’d definitely do Trader Joe’s peppermint joe joes
God, if you can hear me, please help me find parking at trader joes.
I’m starting to think this couple in Trader Joe’s is arguing about something more than just potato salad
“Doesn’t the parking lot need to be at least twice as big?”
- Trader Joes architect
cool date ideas:
-Trader Joe’s frozen aisle
-Trader Joe’s produce section
-Trader Joe’s sample table
-Trader Joe’s flower wall
-Trader Joe’s snack aisle
-Trader Joe’s soup shelves
when you’re young you have all these grand plans for your life but then you find yourself in your 40s emailing Trader Joe’s and asking them to build a store in your town
If you plant an avocado seed a hipster and a bottle of Dr. Bronner’s Liquid Organic Soap and wait 10-12 weeks a Trader Joe’s will sprout up.
What’s the worst thing you’ve had in your cart while running into an ex-hookup at Trader Joe’s? Mine’s 6 cans of clearly marked BEEF CHILI
ME: put all the money in a bag!
TRADER JOE’S EMPLOYEE: oh, you don’t have your own?
My anxiety is never more crippling than when I’m checking out at Trader Joe’s trying to figure out if I forgot to grab something
Used to love mosh pits for the aggressive human contact but now I just shop at Trader Joe’s on a Sunday
going to trader joe’s when im depressed
you’re a middle aged white dude eating your 10th cup of free trader joe’s sampling granola.
how many wrong turns you make to get here tonight?
[in extremely white guy voice] who ate all my trader joe’s soy chorizo
New idea: Bumble, but the only men allowed to sign up are Trader Joe’s employees.
The tension is building as a plethora of white people gather outside Trader Joe’s, waiting for it to open.
Hungry for pineapple infused flak seeds & low calorie no fat Himalayan bird eggs
lip gloss: on
summer jams: blastin
reusable trader joe’s bags: in the passenger seat of my sedan
this joke format: woefully misunderstood
Trent, 28 , vegan, teaches yoga on YouTube, carries all his stuff in trader Joes bags, sleeps in a hammock, vegan.
self-care is buying yourself a microwave meal from trader joe’s for drunchies before you go out for the night :-)
I go to Trader Joe’s for great deals and the opportunity to whisper “excuse me” 200 times.
I don’t like the person I pretend to be when I shop at Trader Joe’s.
Preview photo credit: © Montecito Plaza