When i get married im gonna send invitations to my enemies that have minus ones on them so they’ll know about the wedding but won’t be allowed to go
bobvulfov / Via twitter.com

[inventing wedding dresses]
a massive skirt!
more skirt!
now, put a skirt over her face!
god ya that’s the stuff
whatmaddness / Via twitter.com

Welcome to my rustic wedding, eat these twigs bit*h
DancesWithTamis / Via twitter.com

*At my future wedding*: “Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband”
Me to the groupchat: omg do I say yes or is that desperate
lolzdonz / Via twitter.com

I think the best gift you can give someone for their wedding is a gift with an included, pre-written self-addressed and stamped thank you card
DanaSchwartzzz / Via twitter.com

If you’re best man at your mates second wedding, after being best man at the first, is it ok to start my speech with “Welcome back everyone”??
Skinny_fatbloke / Via twitter.com

I obviously meant to shout “I DON’T OBJECT” sorry that i ruined your wedding
petridishes / Via twitter.com

ME: I do.
PRIEST: Could you say it again without the air quotes?
blade_funner / Via twitter.com

future husband, @ our wedding: isn’t this the best day of your life?
me, thinking of the day I first heard Everytime We Touch: it’s up there
JoeJohnsonIce / Via twitter.com

JUDGE: You’re charged with stealing penguins from the zoo.
ME: *lips right on mic* I needed groomsmen for my wedding, your Honor.
dafloydsta / Via twitter.com

I want my wedding catered by the Costco sample people
bridger_w / Via twitter.com

me at 18: i have hundreds of friends i could ask to hang out with me tonight
me now: maybe the weird dude who spit on me on the train this morning would like to be the best man at my wedding
bobvulfov / Via twitter.com

I want my wedding theme to be “logistical nightmare”
aparnapkin / Via twitter.com

Wedding DJ playing “This Is How We Do It”, a song CLEARLY about Friday night, on a Sunday. Egregious
pattymo / Via twitter.com

I live by one rule: when an event photographer (wedding, school, etc) says “now let’s take some fun ones” I walk the fu*k away
AndyRichter / Via twitter.com

At the end of my sister’s wedding, I released a dozen doves into the sky. That’s what she gets for not paying me to watch her doves.
rolldiggity / Via twitter.com

MY WEDDING: tetris theme plays as i slowly inch down the aisle, trying to perfectly fit my finger in the ring
meganamram / Via twitter.com


proxidog / Via twitter.com


CassieGrimaldi / Via twitter.com

Via BuzzFeed, Preview photo credit: whatmaddness / twitter.com