Everyone loves a good dad joke now and again, right?


Well, lucky for all of us, just the other day Reddit user GrotiusandPufendorf asked people to share their favorite dad joke. And the results TRULY delivered:

Dad putting car in reverse.
Dad: “Ahh, this takes me back.”
Hkatsupreme / Via reddit.com

Dad: “Nice shirt, is that felt?”
Not Dad: “No.”
Dad: *Reaches over and touches sleeve* “It is now!”
Cheese_Pancakes / Via reddit.com

At the park with my girls: “Dad, can we go play?”
Me: “Sure, just stay away from those trees over there.”
Girls: “Umm…OK, why?”
Me: “I don’t know…they look a little shady to me.”
Fleurdelis502 / Via reddit.com

Dad: “Look at that flock of cows over there.”
Kids: “A HERD of cows.”
Dad: “Of course I heard of cows, there is a flock of them right over there.”
ManOfLaBook / Via reddit.com

When I’m at a restaurant and the waitress says: “Do you wanna box for that?”
I always reply with: “No, but I’ll wrestle you for it.”
bdoz138 / Via reddit.com

Host at a restaurant: “Do you have reservations?”
Dad: “Yeah, but I think we’ll still eat here.”
OvaltineDeathFantasy / Via reddit.com

*Dad buying fake Christmas tree*
Cashier: “Are you going to put it up yourself?”
Dad: “Don’t be disgusting…I’m going to put it up in the living room.”
HippieMermaid420 / Via reddit.com

Dad: “Someone among us is an owl.”
Me: “Who?”
Dad: *Narrows eyes suspiciously*
Prestigious_Pringle / Via reddit.com

“Would you like the milk in the bag?”
Dad: “No thanks, you can keep it in the carton.”
Captain-Yesh / Via reddit.com

Dad at breakfast: “I’ll have bacon and eggs, please.”
Waiter: “How do you like your eggs?”
Dad: “I don’t know, I haven’t gotten them yet!”
roman12325 / Via reddit.com

“I love my furniture. My recliner and I go way back.”
akaShadezz11 / Via reddit.com

“I haven’t been to the gym in so long I’ve gone back to calling it James.”
damndingashrubbery / Via reddit.com

“A magician was walking down the street. Then, he turned into a grocery store.”
aworldwithoutshrimp / Via reddit.com

“Three guys walked into a bar. You’d think one of them would have seen it.”
Photon_Torpedophile / Via reddit.com

Dad at lunch: “Do you have anything cheap cuz I’m not that hungry.”
Waiter: “Well maybe the chicken strips for $6.”
Dad: “Well maybe it does, but that doesn’t help my hunger.”
Sjkxism / Via reddit.com

“You know why you never see an elephant hiding in a tree? Because they’re very good at it.”
Fo_eyed_dog / Via reddit.com

“What do you call an illegally parked frog? Toad.”
ProtectedCesc / Via reddit.com

“If a child doesn’t want to take a nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest?”
Achiles_Heals / Via reddit.com

Wife to husband: “I’m pregnant.”
Husband to wife, trying to be funny: “Hi pregnant, I’m dad.”
Wife: “No you’re not.”
llcucf80 / Via reddit.com

“Are you feeling cold? Sit in the corner, it is 90 degrees.”
pwningprincess / Via reddit.com

“You know Orion’s Belt? Big waist of space, huh? Didn’t like that joke? That’s okay…it’s only got 3 stars.”
MoonBasic / Via reddit.com

Dad: “Did you know that the people living nearby actually can’t be buried in that cemetery.”
Kid: “Why?”
Dad: “Because they’re not dead yet.”
cupidadult / Via reddit.com

“Why do graveyards have gates? Because people are dying to get in.”
Vlaed / Via reddit.com

“I lost 25% of my roof last night…oof.”
apgp123 / Via reddit.com

“Someone broke in last night and stole all my anti-depressants. I hope they’re happy.”
WhatAboutMason / Via reddit.com

“What’s Harry Potter’s favourite way to get down a hill?”
“JK, Rolling.”
Sorry_Astronaut / Via reddit.com

“I tell dad jokes. Sometimes he laughs.”
Moleskin21 / Via reddit.com

More info r/AskReddit, H/T BuzzFeed, Preview photo credit: ABC, akaShadezz11 / reddit.com