1.
*genuinely* overheard in waitrose: mu-umm aren’t we out of pomegranate molasses?
@dustIandfairy

2.
Overheard in Waitrose: Sebastian stop hitting your sister, or you won’t get any Brioche!
@gregpanther

3.
Overheard in the village – ‘The paper quality of Waitrose’s Christmas Cards doesn’t seem to equal last year’s, Brexit must have hit hard’
@charlvtte

4.
Overheard at Waitrose “I got so stressed out with the garden my husband just insisted I went shopping at Waitrose to calm ones self down”
@bibleofjess

5.
Overheard in Waitrose. “Security here. There’s a customer with a pet rabbit in a cage. Is it allowed in the store?”
@sarahhirons1

6.
Overheard in Waitrose – “Fuck no more free coffee ! …….. come along Tarquin you little shit , we’re orf to Sainsbury’s ”
@upunchedafish

7.
Overheard in Waitrose. Mummy, does legot have a t in it like merlot?
@kate_organ

8.
Overheard in Waitrose… “Do you know her?” “Yeah, we used to play the cello together”
@markxmitchell

9.
“Mummy doesn’t buy quails eggs, we make our own. Remember?” Conversations overheard in Waitrose
@kieracourtt

10.
overheard in waitrose: “mummy, please can we have quinoa for dinner tonight?”
not okay. no child should WANT quinoa
@emilysnow_96

11.
Overheard in Waitrose:
“No, Giles! Get a nice Chablis. What is it with you and your obsession with Sauvignon Blanc?”
@IHPower

12.
Overheard in Waitrose, ‘Prosecco is so passé.’ Think I’d rather be in the out-crowd.
@jomcarroll

13.
Overheard in Waitrose ‘Do you have organic dog food?’ Babes… your dog literally licks its own arse, not sure rover’s that fussed
@MissLivvy_Evans

14.
Overheard in Canary Wharf Waitrose : “that pay rise is making you feel special”
@Nick_Dorman

15.
Overheard in Waitrose car park:
“Oh, Bertie! You’re not to touch Daddy’s craft Beers.”
@steve_draws

16.
Just overheard someone say “You’re Welcome” to the self scan machine after it thanked them for shopping at waitrose
How very British
@marcnobbs

17.
Overheard in Waitrose, “I’m a Waitrose person for all my Marxist credentials”
@staceyy92

18.
[Overheard]
“Waitrose have sold out of my favourite Duchy of Cornwall Zesty Lemon Curd so don’t talk to me about your f*cking problems!”
@RobertJohnBrown

19.
So, we had our own Overheard in Waitrose moment earlier
“Daddy, do you remember that time I was on a cheese farm in France..”
@trashedlegacy

20.
Overheard in Waitrose: ‘So I asked him outright – how am I supposed to get homemade hummus out of cashmere?’
@toonbear69

21.
(Overheard in Waitrose)
Child to mother: “Why do you always have coffee?”
Mother: “Because I have you, mummy needs coffee”
@Oliver__James

@swharrietjaneb

22.
Overheard in Waitrose yesterday: a dad telling his young son when buying white wine that this was “mummy’s water”.
@mario

23.
Overheard in waitrose at the butcher counter..
“Can you believe I was 40 before I had quail?”
@KendalHove

24.
Overheard in Waitrose “Jemima, you’ll have to take the Rosemary off the Focaccia before we feed the ducks, Darling…. They can’t digest it!”
@Jo90callingUK

25.
Overheard in Waitrose: “do they have any gluten-free yorkshire puddings?”
@gogobillyboy

26.
Overheard in a Waitrose in Surrey
“Our house has its own postcode, it’s really handy for the sat nav, as it takes us half-way up our drive”
@Sunchartist

27.
Overheard in waitrose: ‘don’t use a leaf blower when you’re wearing a scarf- I nearly hanged myself.’
@Fineaspect

28.
Overheard in Waitrose: “Darling have we run out of porcini mushrooms?”
It was me. I said that.

@AdamLloyd87

29.
‘Put it back. I’ve started making my own ironing water.’
@GemAlkis

30.
Overheard at lunchtime in Waitrose: “I’ve started doing my weekly shop at Aldi but I don’t talk to anyone there”.
@Monk_Wally_Honk

31.
Overheard in Waitrose: ‘Mummy, why have you bought Waitrose Essentials Carrots?’
‘Don’t worry, Rufus, they’re for the horses’
@CTolleyMusic

32.
Overheard in Waitrose: “But Mummy… I want the venison and chorizo sausages!”
@IHPower