1. This beginning to what is bound to be a very long declaration
i, personally, would love to calm down, and yet kittyit

2. This moment you can never resist:
me: i’m staying out of the drama
also me: guess fucking what psimagnet

3. This daily ritual
ok no offense but some of us *looks pointedly at self in mirror* need to fucking chill melchiorgabor

4. This likely scenario
me? overreacting? probably moncherrie

5. This impressive bit of acting
person: you come across really chill
me: yeah i suppose i am
my constant, unending, internal monologue: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA marshalmallow

6. This advice you might wanna start taking yourself
‘’yall need to chill’’ says me, who isn’t chill, not even a little bit. theironman

7. This perfect response for when someone dares stifle you
If anyone ever accuses you of doing something “for attention,” simply gaze heroically into the middle distance and murmur, “like Lord Byron before me.” spitandvinegar

8. This word you don’t know the meaning of
someone: can u….chill…..
me: chill….hm………never experienced…that emotion….. antisleep

9. This utter lack of chill in your foreseeable future
everyone’s having their mid-life crises at like 19 olivertrees

10. This self-assessment spacexy

11. This mantra that never (always) fails
Me: *gets anxious*
Me: chill

Me: *gets jealous*
Me: chill

Me: *overthinks*
Me: chill

Me: *gets clingy*
Me: chill

chill thequeermisfit

12. This handy no-chill guide
-me
-automatic toilets
-people who clap when the plane lands davidduchovnie

13. This callout
there she goes again being over dramatic and by she i mean me imamdrake

14.
me at any sign of even my smallest responsibilities: victoriavandal

15. This post that just about sums it up
“how would your friends describe you?” fuglyselfie

16. This portrait of you, the chillest
me: [doesnt get attention for fifteen seconds]

me: [drapes self over the lounge] it is fine. i am Okay. i suppose it is simply my destiny to die alone. Abandoned. Without a soul in the world to care for me. [delicately wipes a glistening tear from my eye] i’m not bothered. i Understand why you all Hate Me and wish me dead. after all, maybe it is all for the best……. [i stare forlornly into the middle distance, allowing my limbs to go slack as i lie back and wait to wither away, ignored forever] manic-pixie-dream-histrionic

17. This valiant effort
me: *closes eyes and tries to chill for 5 whole seconds*
me: i cannot jaebumblog