When I would complain about not getting something I wanted, my mom would say, “Well people in hell want ice water.”
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Whenever I ask my mom where something is she says, “If I find it, can I hit you with it?” She’s a delight.
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Whenever I made my mom mad, she’d refer to me as “Your daughter” to my father.
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While in the car, whenever we would miss a turn or had to turn around, she would pull into a random driveway and say, “Oh, I asked these people yesterday if we could use their driveway…”
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Instead of saying “You bet your sweet a*s” my mom would always say, “You bet your bippy!” Here I am, thirty-five years old, and I still have no earthly idea what a bippy is, or why she’d say that.
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After I turned 20, whenever I was headed out with friends for a night on the town, she used to say: “If you’re not in bed by 12, come home.” (She said this IN FRONT of my friends, and this solidified my mother’s legendary status).
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My mom’s go-to has always been: “Why am I the only one who knows how to do anything?” This applies to finding lost shoes, grabbing a food item from the cupboard, or taking out the trash.
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Whenever we’d refer to my mother as “she” in front of her, she would immediately interrupt with: “Who’s ‘she?’ the cats mother?!” Apparently, it was something my grandmother used to say to my mom, and now it’s definitely something I’ll pass on.
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My mom would always say “Open your brains” when she dropped us off at school. We still use it to this day.
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Any time we’d ask her to do something, we’d get the old “I was not put on this earth to entertain you!”
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My mom has so many catchphrases, but my personal favorite was “sit down before you fall down.”
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Whenever someone answers her by just nodding their head rather that speaking, she says “I can’t hear your head shaking!”
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My mom would always say, “You can only control yourself.” It’s some amazing wisdom, and I recall it any time someone else annoys me. it helps me return to a calm space where I can control how I react to what’s going on around me.
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Any time we left on a drive, my mom would say, “And we’re off! Like a herd of turtles!” The, when we arrived, she’d say, “All ashore that’s going ashore!” These are embedded in my mind!
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Whenever my mom calls me (or vice versa), she answers the phone by saying “Oh helleeer” in the most nasally voice possible. Without fail. Every time. Often in rooms full of people. I’m not sure how this started, but I hope it never stops.
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“Don’t look at me in that tone of voice” was said whenever we would roll our eyes or make any facial expression she didn’t approve of.
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If we can’t find something that’s right in front of us, my mom says, “Si fuera culebra te pica (If it was a snake, it would bite you)!”
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My mum has so many, but one of our favorites was when she was trying to tell my brother off — she meant to say, with a stern face, “Stop that or I’ll crack you!” But it came out “Stop that or I’ll quack you!” We all just absolutely roared and she’s never lived it down. Bless her, she’s amazing.
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Every time I’d leave for a party in high school, she’d say, “Remember who you are and WHOSE you are.”
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